How was I to have any clue that Jolene would act so bizarrely every time
I tried to get her to be herself, that is, be straight with me? I never saw this
whole thing coming. I was fucking blindsided! Suddenly no matter where
I went, she was "around." Amsterdam is actually a pretty small town, especially
when a "daterape-prefering" stalker is hanging around wherever you go!
In the later case, it is a very small town!
After the third or fourth time I screwed up my courage to approach
her and speak to her, and was "acted-off," (my analogous term for being
"blown-off" or "jacked-off," metaphorically) I began to wonder if she was mad.
I mean in the sense of insane. But for whatever reason, I could not believe
that one, though she seemed to make it weirder and weirder, just on
purpose, to confound me. She royally fucked up my mind, and the damage
remains to this day. Some honesty would be nice.